Thursday, August 17, 2006

Thank goodness for tacos

So here is the progression of my evening...

Your Girl: I was deep in thought on my walk home after leaving an event for beauty bloggers and publicists. My thoughts are interrupted by a hand on my shoulder...I turn to see who must have accidentally brushed against me with an odd amount of force...

Dude: Hey, Natural. How are you?

Your Girl: I'm fine. Rolling eyes out of Dude's sight but secretly happy that he called me "Natural"

Dude: Where are you from?

Your Girl: Atlanta.

Dude: Reeeeaaaaally, I just got back from there. How long are you here?

Your Girl: I live here...but contemplating the move based on this encounter.

Dude: Ooohhh!!! I'm from the Bahamas. Where are you off to?

Your Girl: The drugstore and then home. Picking up my recently adopted New-York-speed-walking pace.

Dude: Well, I'll walk with you.

Your Girl: Grreeaaaat. Well let me just tell you now that I'm not going to give you my phone num...

Dude: Throws hands back in defense...Whoa! I don't need your number! That's fine! I'm a millionaire! I don't need your number, I can get anybody's number...!

Your Girl: WTF??!! This night is so going in the blog.

Dude: By the way, I just had sex, so...

**Crickets...looking around for a candid camera**

Your Girl: I REALLY don't care. So you're just roaming the streets trying to pick up girls?

Dude: Oh no, she's a girl that works at the airport. Can't remember how I met her. It was a quickie.

Your Girl: My lip curls in utter disgust. I'm not talking about your sexual experiences, I meant WHY ARE YOU STILL WALKING WITH ME.

Dude: Well, you said you lived here and that got me kind of exci....OOOOOHHHH!!! Look at that restaurant! See what you get when you walk around?! You know that's the oldest steak house in New York.... probably the world!

Your Girl: That's Smith & Wollensky and it says right there on the side of the building that it was founded in 1977. Pretty sure steaks existed before the 70s.

Dude: No, I think that's the place...hey let me ask this dude...floating towards a man perched on 49th and 3rd who was clearly homeless and had probably never tasted steak.

Your Girl: Later! Putting that New-York-speed-walking pace to work. Whew! Lost him.

UNBELIEVABLE. But I will say the night ended up well. I dropped my stuff off at home, grabbed my keys and my check card and made my way to Chipotle to pick up dinner (partly to make sure crazy man wasn't lurking around my doorstep). I do the Chipotle conga line while a disgruntled employee tops off my soft tacos with a bit too much sour cream. The friendly guy at the register gives me my total and I hand him my check card....which is when I realize that I brought my ID and not my check card. UGH! He consults with his boss in Spanish and they let me jet off with my tacos after I promise to come by tomorrow with some cashish.
Free tacos for dinner!
What a lovely ending to a very bizarre evening!

5 souls spinning:

At 4:07 PM, August 20, 2006, Blogger kittenpower said...

very nice encounter. there are some WEIRD people out there!

At 4:01 PM, August 21, 2006, Blogger inciquay said...

Wow, I can only imagine that if I lived in New York this dude would find me and start talking to me too! I don't knnow what it is but I've got some kind of magnetic pull for nuts to come talk to me. YOu visited my blog, I might have rubbed off on you! LOL
No! I wouldn't wish that on anybody! Loved the post, keep 'em coming!

At 6:32 PM, August 21, 2006, Anonymous bgibson said...

That was a very odd encounter. I'm glad I don't run into nuts like that here in TX. But then, we don't walk around outside here because it is blazing HOT. Anyway, I'm glad he didn't follow you home.

At 10:38 AM, August 22, 2006, Anonymous PJJ said...

Oh my gosh! That was the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Keep em coming please!

At 7:59 PM, August 23, 2006, Blogger Your Girl said...

kp: the weird just keep getting weirder!

inciquay: i can't say that i always attract weirdos, but i am that attracts that one person at a party or in my high school biology class or wherever that attracts the super lame. it's my own fault because i feel bad for them and send "how are you" or even a smile their way and all of a sudden we're friends for life. maybe i rubbed off on you, too! :-)

bgibson: oh believe me it gets SCORCHING here in the city. three weeks ago it was absolutely miserable. heat index was somewhere around 110 degrees. AWFUL. but you do have the luxury of fewer nuts than nyc....and you have an air conditioned car...

pjj: thanks, darling! visit your girl more often!


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